Healing from a storm and growing with the colors of the sunset.

Image

I once read a quote that read “Clouds come floating into my life, no longer to carry rain or usher storm, but to add color to my sunset sky.”

Not too long ago, I decided to take a different view on life. I didn’t make this decision in a time where I knew I was struggling, in fact, I was completely unaware of the life I had been living. My life at the time was mediocre. I was going through the motions, and I had been living this way for years, maybe a majority of my life. It seems like it would be easy to know if you weren’t living your life to the fullest, or if you weren’t happy, but for me it wasn’t. I wasn’t living life unhappily to my conscious knowledge. I enjoyed life, laughed, worked hard, and loved. I had a great group of friends, a supportive and loving family, and I lived a more than comfortable lifestyle. I thought there was no way that I could ask for or need more.

The moments in which I realized I was unhappy with my lifestyle were unspecific, minute moments of my life. I remember the days when dropping a piece of cheese on the floor ruined my mood, and I turned into this hostile and aggressive person I wouldn’t recognize today. I began to realize something was wrong. Towards the end, I seriously considered that fact that I may be depressed, and needed to see a doctor. I’m not a huge fan of the doctor, so of course, I attempted to look for alternatives. I couldn’t of even imagined that it was me, and the way I decided to live my life.

I started to read up on perspective, look at blogs, and really take a look at my life. I wouldn’t be able to tell you what sparked the realization that occurred, but I can tell you that whatever it was, changed my life for the better and saved me from continuing with a life I wasn’t proud of. In the beginning, I didn’t even know what changed. I was happier, I just knew I felt more alive. I started to get upset less, and I began to look at people differently, look at myself differently. The situations I got put in, I viewed more positively.

Positive, the word that describes what I then had suddenly realized changed. Now, if I dropped a piece of cheese on the floor, I would assume there was a reason I wasn’t supposed to eat that specific piece of cheese. I’m not trying to say that the reason that I came up with is true, but it made me feel better, and ultimately, isn’t that what life is about? I sat down, and spent some time thinking about how difficult it was to live life when everything I thought about was negative. Even worse, that I thought life at that time was great. I was so grateful for what I had been given in life, that I wasn’t being grateful for life itself. I was living in such a way, that I know now, later down the road, I would not have been proud of.

Today, I try to spread optimism. When a bad situation occurs, I try to lighten it by suggesting why it may have happened, or remembering how lucky the situation is compared to how it could have been. The hostility is completely gone, and now I rarely feel the need to sit down and cry or be angry with someone. The clouds in my life have a different meaning now. The storm is over, and I’m beginning to heal and grow as a person. I’m not done changing, and I don’t think I ever will be. I’m really glad though, that I’ll keep changing and growing. If you’re lucky enough to realize that it’s happening, it’s one of the best experiences that you can have happen to you.

The key to being happy: be grateful

“But I have found that with the simple act of living with hope, and in the daily effort to have a positive impact in the world, the days I do have are more meaningful and precious. And for that I am grateful.”

-Elizabeth Edwards

Things I am grateful for:

  • Life
  • My memories
  • Experiences
  • People Who:
    • inspire me
    • influence me
    • love me unconditionally
    • think about me
    • offer me wisdom and knowledge
    • give me self-confidence
    • compliment me
    • give me the truth when need-be
  • Communication
  • Music
  • Art
  • Expression
  • Generosity and Kindness
  • Miracles
  • The belief in something greater
  • My bad days
    • the ability to see the good in my bad days
    • the good days that make the bad days worth it
  • My good days
    • my really good days
  • individuality
  • independence
  • my innate ability to see the good in people
  • wearing my heart on my sleeve
  • Family
    • my mother’s strength
    • my father’s quirkiness
    • my dog’s never-ending love for life and people
  • pushing through hard times
  • Spirits of:
    • strength
    • courage
    • weakness
    • sensitivity
    • power
    • wisdom
    • maturity
    • happiness
    • joy
    • sadness
    • pain
    • innocence
    • purity
    • madness
    • sanity
    • insanity
    • patience
  • cherishing the good
  • reminiscing
  • past, current, and future close friends and acquaintances
  • appreciated effort
  • growing older
  • watching others grow older
  • all the things that could have gone wrong today, but didn’t

I once read, it is not the happy people who are grateful, but the grateful people who are happy. After reading it more than a dozen times, and mulling over what it meant to me, it finally hit me. I started to practice being happier, and really enjoying what I have been given. Now, forgetting the immense amount of blessings a person has in their life describes an unbearable situation for me. I can’t help but be reminded of the blessings I have in my life beginning the moment I wake up, a blessing in itself. I feel so grateful for the life I have been given, as well as the people in it. I hope someday to share my blessings with someone truly in need of them. So, to end with some words of motivation…you deserve to live a life worth living for. “Try to be alive, you will be dead soon enough (credits to Ernest Hemingway).” Maybe 99% of you reading this didn’t need to hear those words, but that 1% did, and that’s all that matters. Have a great rest of the day.

Take care,

Sierra